Drowning in Tears

I am the one who stands guard behind your back.
I am the one who smiles, even when my world seems black.
I want to be the one who you scream so hard for.
But all I'll ever be is just your shadow.

You'll sing his name so proudly.
I'll turn around and show you a smile slightly.
I love seeing you so happy.
But why do these words I hold back hurt so painfully?
Why does my heart feel as if it’s dieing slowly?

I bite my lips so tight.
My mouth almost filled with blood.
I can't spill my life into something that will never be.
I'm falling, and I'm afraid of the crashing.

I'll scream your name into the ocean,
My desperate attempts to drown my emotion.
Water above my chest, and I can hardly breathe.
A few more steps and then the ocean floor will be way below my feet.
And I'll drown into the bottom and never float.
The weight of this suffering is like an anchor for a boat.

The tears you poured onto my shoulder,
And each embrace from you makes it harder,
To think of actually leaving this world.
Either in heaven or hell, all I can do is watch you and nothing more.
When I can stay here and suffer, and be your hidden helper.