The end of our friendship

So i lost my trust in my friends...
its different this way, and how it had to end.

you know you couldnt take the pain i went through, i know you couldnt give as much of attention as you say you would have liked to.

but the truth is..you didnt even try to pick me up when i fell..i was down and alone, and screaming for someone
but again you rejected saying you now know who won.

it was you because you werent dieing from depression..
i was lost being alone and hurt, especially from rejection.

i see though that you never really cared..
because you watched me fade away and drift farther in my fears.

i cant remember a time when i was down and crying, and you came to me caught everytear and said youd be there to prove you werent lieing.

you were never here, and never cared..so when it now comes to your life, ill be anywhere but there.

so when i wrote this i was thinking about the friends i have.. but i cant make such a change and throw it all away, even though im hurting more and more eachday because how they treat me now. i never asked for full attention, i asked for a best friend, and got nothing. my life is a waste, and i wish i could just find some friends who care enough to show me something more and help me out of this misery..because right now..all i need..is a friend