Whenever we're like this,
when life seems like hell,
everything seems to go so wrong,
I wonder if things will ever get well.
But even when everything seems fine,
behind those eyes is where your pain lies,
it hurts so much to see them,
but I pretend its OK and try to make time fly.
Whenever I think about you,
and all that you go through,
I remember how useless I am,
since I can't do anything to make you feel less blue.
Maybe my surface means nothing,
it shows nothing like what is underneath,
but I know it'll all just going to cause us all more heartbreak,
if I show any weakness, our pain will only be a time thief.
All your friends think I don't care,
sometimes i wonder if I am wrong again,
but I know things will only be worse if I don't stay strong,
I hope that you will never ever see my pain.
I gave it a 4, because in some cases you changed from past to present tense or vice versa. Main thing that I see needs improvement is that, and maybe word choice. Nice try, though.