Surrender

My steps grow rapidly collision with love and heartbreak.

I take a step back looking at mistakes I make.

The sky is gray, and the rains pouring down,

I could dance and sing but instead I don't make a sound.

Intensity grows as loneliness of my life starts devouring my smile.

If only you would have thought a moment, thought on you and I awhile.

Jokes turn to laughter as it's my childish innocence you want

Imbedded in me my thoughts of family empower me.

I just need a break from it, for once just an instance to forget.

Reality might be the perfect word for suffering too much of it just shuts off all other thoughts.

I am holding the white flag thinking I will surrender, my dreams so unreal and fake like and nothing its imperfection.

My grip starts to tighten, I can barley swallow I'm so scared.

Blood starts pumping my heart beat is so scarce.

Eyes big and beady are staring out at something.

It is, fear, anger, pain and suffering running through my veins.

Like a castle under siege they tell me to give up, hands down just let them tell me when I have had enough.

For I keep going, when so many pull me down, I am still fighting for life,

Searching for a love through a heartless, unspoken crowd