Going

by Joel   Mar 17, 2006


I'm going to California I'm going to end my life going to end the pain night after night dream of the night i will die a little bit of pain goes along way tonight

I'm on my way heading for the grave thats where ill stay ill never be going back home do you ever feel like you need to die hanging out where no one wants to end

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  • 18 years ago

    by ..eliSa*

    My honest opinion would be that this poem needs some work. it has a lot of potential to is though, there is a lot of pain behind it and i think that if u were to fix ur formation and use some metephors to describe your pain it could "go a long way tonight" :)..hope i didnt cause any offense! good work, keep it up

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