Un-Answerable

I sit here in the quite dark,
listen but don't hear.
Quiet sparks.

Question my life,
why am I still breathin?
Not sitting under the cold knife.

I close my eyes,
Seeing the future and present.
But still only seeing mystery and lies.

My breath shortening under the cold.
My head is thudding.
I'm feeling sold.

Non-answerable questions sit in my head.
My heart is crying out.
Yet am I dead?

With the lies impacted so deep.
I cry out in fear.
All the secrets I must keep.