Humor

I really liked the theme of this and the general message you are portraying. The comparisions to the impoverished children, and just children in general, work well and are effective at getting your message across. I'd suggest breaking it up just a bit cause I read two distinctive ideas so maybe two seperate stanzas would work well? I particulary liked the ending too beacuse it is optimistic but also reads almost as a warning and a reminder that someday it will be too late.

We all need a little laughter sometimes. This was well written and the way you broke up the lines gave this message maximum impact. Putting the innocence of children along side the shots and violence was a powerful image in this poem. Your titles are so clever and this wokred ironically well. EXCELLENT!!

[lostlaureate - come find me]

A very inspirational write! I also find myself writing about child’s laughter often.... But I loved how you used such unique words and circumstances!

Hmm, i understood this poem very easily, and knew what you meant until the last 5 lines, I'm not sure what your tryingto say and kind of got lost, overal, I understood the mesage you were trying to give: There are so many things happening in the world and people keep going on with their lives as if nothing is happening, I like tis poem because of that message, although the flow could be better, some lines were good, but others weren't as good. but overall, it was good.