Sorry For Not Waiting

I can't tell you
How many tears
I've cried
My doubts and fears
Keep me out in the open
There's no place to hide

Look at my past
Tell me what you see
My wounds have put me in casts
The scars will never heal
Injuries are left exposed
My mistakes are revealed

Pushing you away
I try to cover my sin
Wanting to lose my past
I hide myself within

I push you away
Hoping that you'll see
You are wasting your time
By spending it with me

I don't know if my ways
Will ever change
Though it was a while ago
I fear that I'll always
Feel so uncomfortable and strange

You've been nothing but good to me
But your eyes are blind
How I long to make you see
The baggage that I go through
The things that I carry
If only your really knew

I'm sorry you don't understand
Maybe having you then losing you
Was all part of God's plan
Leaving you or not
That I'm still debating
All I have to say is
I'm sorry for not waiting

*I wrote this poem hoping to get the point through that, sex is a gift for marriage. God made it that way, and when you abuse that gift beforehand, things change, and the people that you really want to spend the rest of your life with are left in the dark because they really don't know what you've been through. Sex can wait. It hurts so many when it's not saved for marriage.*