I Can...

by N J Thornton   Mar 22, 2006


Crystal - bitter to touch
Beads of perspiration
Emit a dull thud, once then
Twice... pitter-patter.

Humid breath sending
A patch of glass opaque,
As a callus forefinger smears
A view into shapes, letters.

"I c-a-n" reveals the outside
As droplets reflect a light,
Blurry skies, and thoughts
Breath dissolving - distant.

Pace must be quickened
Aqua bells, rush the finger
Icy pane melting on touch
As one enduring blink writes
"S-E-E"

**I know it's rather cliche, naughty Silver *slaps self on wrist,* but I thought it was quite uplifting. By all means correct me if I'm wrong, and then I shall promptly delete it.

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Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by lost_laureate

    I didn't find it cliche at all. You were really on top of this poem and the imagery was certainly thought provoking..set my imagination off....great poem...

    [lostlaureate - come find me]

  • 18 years ago

    by Jacqui Armstrong

    I didnt really understand it... but im sure its really good, there was a good flow.

    Jacs
    xxx

  • 18 years ago

    by master of shadow

    Very good use of imegry within this peice and some interesting vocab usage too. this peice has a smooth flow and great content

    5/5

  • 18 years ago

    by BrokenToy

    I like it. It has a lot of words I'm unfamiliar with, mainly because english isn't my first language. But I love to read something that showes a little different vocabulary use. It was fun to read it. Keep up the good work! ^_^

    *BrokenToy

  • 18 years ago

    by lost_laureate

    Wow...breath taking....amazing ending....*catches breath*
    What's the name of your book?

    [lostlaureate - come find me]

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