Look at the marks on my arm
I did not try to kill my self
I only thought about it
I contemplated all the ways
But thought about where I would be
Where I would go
I sit here and I ask forgiveness
â??God can you forgive me
For the evil Iâ??m about to doâ??
I take a piece of paper and I start to write
- I forgive you all
Do not hate me
Do not cry
I could not longer live my life
To my Toddles, so beautiful
And strong, keep your faith and do no wrong
For my father what could I say?
To ease the pain
To know you will never see my
Rat- Chinese eyed face
To the women who caused most of the my pain
I do not hate you or any other thing
My heart is too big
But I will never be able to show the world
How much I could care
To the world
For all of you who do not know me
I say I could have helped
Made you a better place to lay your head
Now you must lie in your own stupid filth
But no matter what
You all have a place in my heart
Just remember me for the good in me
And pay no heed to the tear drops
Just know I died because
I could no longer live in my world-
I put down the pen
Picked up the pills
Took all thirty with my glass of milk
I turned away from the world knowing
I canâ??t go back
I whisper â??forgive meâ??
As a tear roll down my face
I walk around for just a little bit
Waiting for the pills to kick in
I climb the stairs
Knowing my world is about to end
I pick up Raspberry
And I say good-bye
I pray to God he hears my pleas
I get into bed
I have a sense of calm
A peace of mind
Even though I will never be a mother
A wife
A daughter
A sister
I walked away from my life
With no turning back
No wrong can be made right
No lies turned to truth
I close my eyes
I start to cry
I think
Why would I try suicide?
Time is almost up
I hear a small voice
You only have two years left
Then you could live your life
The way you want
My mind
Heart
Soul
Agree
But time is so short
Way not lose it now
I think to myself
My pain is too much to bear
The voice again
This life is not yours to take
Something pulls me up
I walk to the phone and dial
9-1-1
I tell the operator I took thirty pills
My time is almost up
And I donâ??t want to die
Look at the marks on my arm
I did not want to kill myself
But I thought of the ways
I contemplated how
But pushed those thoughts back
For
This
Is
Not
My
Life
To
Take
