Comments : Spring Relief

  • 18 years ago

    by Daniel J

    Though this is a poem which rhymes well and reads smoothly, as well as being simple enough to understand, I was somewhat confused by the very first word in the poem: "alas."

    Did you intend to write this word, or are you looking for another? Alas is defined by answers.com as "used to express sorrow, regret, grief, compassion, or apprehension of danger or evil."

    I would suggest that the word "behold" or something similar, would do better.
    Unless, of course, I've completely misunderstood the entire poem, which is possible...

  • 18 years ago

    by Samantha Compton

    Cool! Nice, Noni. In the 7th line, you need to put 'reborn', not 'reborned' kk? But it was still good over all. I wrote some new stuff, but I think you already read it. Idk, check it out.