Its great.
I love it.
It makes a lot of sense.

Very sad! I like it, it is a great story and nicely written. To make the flow better you could try to lay poems out in stanzas with a similar amount of syllables in each line. Great work and take care
- Polly x

Wow, I could really picture this in my head. The way you described it was really good. You did an exellent job on this on! Keep it up, && Smile =] 5/5

`natalie x-x

Fantastic job! you're astounding.