Untitled

When I was younger people asked
Why I would cry when I should have
Been happy, why I looked so sad and forlorn
I never told them that I cried because of you
I held that burden inside my heart
Never letting on that deep inside I was breaking.

I cried inside because you hurt me
Hiding in my room I cried in secret
Because I knew that if you saw me
You would not care either way
When you hit me I felt so worthless
When you yelled at me I felt so small.

People always ask me if I'm alright
Why I act so quiet and discreet
When I should enjoying everything I have have
I never them that because of you
I don't trust anyone-not even my closest friends
Because of you I feel unworthy of anyone's love.

I sit in silence kept company by my insecurities
My inner demons haunting me in my sleep
Desperately I search for a way to let it all out
A way for me to release the pain kept inside:
When no one else was there for me
I turned further inward, shutting everyone out.

I thought I knew you but what I saw
Was only an illusion of what you really were
You left me when I needed you the most
You hurt me you made me cry you broke my soul
But no matter how much you hurt me
I still want you to be a part of my life.

Why did you do the things that you did
Why did you make fun of me and taunt me
Did you do it because you didn't care
Or was it because I'm not your real daughter?
Did you hate me so much that you left
Is it because I wasn't good enough?

You made me feel so worthless and pathetic,
I felt unworthy of anyone's affection
Because you never showed me any love
Daddy every time I think of you loneliness takes over
Even though I hate you I love you anyway
Is it too much to ask for your love?