Why Did I Pay?

Struggle to keep my eyes open
swollen shut from bleeding tears
and then suddenly running out
replaced by a feeling of shock

I stand at the door as you move closer
I see in your head, a hope
But in your heart- only despair
I am not blind to this

My last words spoken are
"one last chance..."
a cry for help
for the unwanted taste of helplessness

I throw my arms out and
grasp handfuls of air
crushing the deceptive silence
as you now bring your own arm up

One thought pulls me through
as a shot rings in the air
and I fall to the floor
in someone else's blood.