Fartings No Crime

I've had problems with gas in the past.
Sometimes, they just slip out too fast.
Spent many a hours, clenching my bowel,
but sometimes, you just gotta rip a**.

When I was younger I was often harassed,
because of the smell of the gas that I passed.
I tried holding it in, I still couldn't win,
I often passed gas in the front of the class.

One time, in the hall, I delivered a pass.
On the way there I was moving too fast.
I dropped to my knees, and felt the warm breeze,
but what came out, was more than just gas.

The wet ones are most definitely the worst,
they come by surprise and never come first.
With little warning, feeling, or sign,
you feel a tremble, a gurgle, and then a quick burst.

So when you're out with your friends the next time,
don't worry, fart freely, farting is no crime.
But, always remember, yes please don't forget,
farting is poetic, what stinks is the rhymes.