Standing while going backwards,
bent doubled over
flipping sideways
and melting upside down.
My foot stuck in two doors
right and left,
forwards and backwards,
twisted spine,
I become a swirl
Mixing emotion like paint thinner in my skull
my eyes circle around and around.
Sometimes I ride the merry go round, sitting atop a red horse, Half the time I don\'t wave at anyone
and jump off and tie myself down to train tracks
where I\'ll hope they\'ll run me over.
I smile too easily and get lost in the abyss of dreams sticky like molasses.
I search for truth in those eyes, and tell myself I\'ve found it, and make believe my fingers touch golden rods of happiness
And where I am? Alone and somber, but breahting steadily. The warmth of tears bitter and smooth like honey down my face.
Those flashes of promises
my foolish head recorded
repeating endlessly,
until I smash the record player and finally pull the plug.
Merry go rounds and train tracks slow to a hault
I tie myself to a rock in the desert, to be burned by the sun.
