I really like the 1st stanza. the rest seems to be a bunch of thoughts put down. maybe rearranging it a bit

I agree but even the first stanza didn't fit with the rhyme. The last line of it seemed forced. Maybe organize a bit, write it on paper, read it aloud, and see what could be done :)

Ok so I don't have a clue why someone would give this poem a 1 rating... I really hope you get the rating up from decent voters. It's very heartfelt. I love poems that don't have to rhyme for the sake of rhyming.