I need to find something true

I was sitting there surrounded by you all
I was laughing and joking, and having a ball
But that was just the outside, I was frozen in my core
I don't know what I want out of life, but I feel like I need something more
I feel like I need someone to come and steal my heart
I need someone to sit by my and take my hand whenever these feelings start
Life needs to hold something deeper than this superficial fun
I found something, it captured my heart, then within 3 weeks it was gone
I don't want you all to pity me as I stare into my glass
But I want something to mean something to me deep down inside at last
So life please give me something that I can hold onto
Let me find a meaning, I need to find something true