I can't feel

The feelings are very strong and the poem just made me think about alot of things... anyways it was a great poem that I can relate to! ^_^

Ok....wel first off i have to tell you that if there weren't a God i wouldn't be sharing my testimony with you right now. He loves you hun. And sometimes he puts us through stuff so that we will come out stronger. No he doesn't do anything bad or allow evil because he is a god of good. Well let me start. First off let me share with you my mom was in prison for 11 years of life. I only had contact with her once a month. I don't know my dad but i found out a while ago that he died because his liver failed. You see he loved his drugs more than me. I was raped from the time i was 9 until 11. And no one would do anything. Let me back up i lived with my grandma and uncles. I was raped by one of my uncles continuously. And the others were physically and verbally abusive. How do you think i felt? I was crushed. I started to cut myself A LOT. I hated who I was and i was bulimic. I didn't even want to wake up in the morning because i didn't want to see what lay ahead. So basically i was a dead girl walking. I was hopeless and selfish (so people said) i had no where to go... i was lost and broken. I was on the verge of death. You know when your standing on a cliff and just as i was about to jump i realized that there was so much more i could be and soo much more i could become. I started feeding and leaning into him. And he changed me and yes hun you can also be reached. God created every single thing about us and everything on us. therefore its perfect because it was through his eyes that it was seen. Im here im standing here...im living for him. and hell yeah its gonna be hard because everyone attacks chrsitians because they know that we have something and that its a wonderful thing nd their to stubborn to believe in Jesus and his miracles. And for those people i am soo sorry for because they will spend an eternity in hell NEVER being able to feel god's love again.