My mind wanders back
Through the years and the tears
Taking the journey that
Was to be forgotten
The pain rises, and then falls
Like waterdrop crystals in the rain
The memories leap forward
And then die, tragedy to be erased
The night it happened, my soul died
A thousand times over and fear became
My constant and dwelling companion
Swiftly replacing the love that I felt inside
The curtains were closed and the
Darkness outside enveloped the sun
The television hammered a show
Watched a thousand times by others
I wore jeans, and a jumper I think
The memory fades as I journey through
Years of distance in my mind
Years of horror and of pain
I was so innocent, I did not know
The pain was to start the instant
My father said \"Come and share the couch\"
I loved him for an instant
And then the pain and the scare
The horror and the nightmares started
The hiding and the tradegy
The loss of my family
The loss of my friends, the crying
The hospitalisation, the therapy
The arguments, suicide,
Not eating and refusing to talk; confusion
My soul took a dive that day.
It hid beneath the pain and the misery
Shining like a beacon saying
I am here, when you want me
All I needed to do was listen
And to understand I was always there,
That is was the fear that held me at bay
That crumpled me into a thousand pieces
Memories of a sexually abused child, the first time the horror happened. It was to last another 6 years.
www.whitedovesnest.com - a site dedicated to sexual abuse survivors and their supporters.
