*this is free verse so it's a bit blocky - reading it fairly quickly helps :o) *
All I want to do is to run, as fast as I can into the middle of nowhere. Where I can scream. Cry. And feel. I just want to run and run forever without stopping, without needing to or wanting to stop. I want to be alone. I want to feel alive. I want to run away from my frustrated fears, the people that hurt me, run from the candy and razor blades. I want to run to be thin. I want to run to be free. I want to run to be self-sufficient, to be supported by the tarmac beneath my feet. I don't want to be still anymore. I want to lead my life. I want to live my life. I don't want to stand still, and short and alone and afraid. I want to move. I want to have the kind of beauty that moves. I want to scream because I want to. Not for anyone else to hear. Not for anyone else to care, just because I want to. I want to be me.
I don't want to be afraid anymore. I don't want to be judged anymore. I want to be a mess inside and out and for nobody to see because I am alone. I want to feel the grass between my toes and be blinded by the sun without someone by my side. I want independence. I am alone in my mind. I'm far from alone in real life. I am surrounded by people who trap me, who hurt me, who take away who I am. I am screaming, and running and feeling the heat of the sun on my back. I am moving, and flowing, controlling every breath I take, and meaning every single breath I take.
I want to run, as fast as I can into the middle of nowhere. Where I can scream, and be me.
