Why Do I Do This To Myself?

I can't keep telling myself that things will change,
when I know in my heart it will always be the same.
I can't keep believing you'll come around,
when my heart breaks you don't even hear the sound.
I can't keep holding on to something that isn't there,
when I know deep inside you don't really care.
I can't keep making excuses for you to make myself feel better,
when I know in my heart its more than just the change in the weather.
I can't keep putting myself through hell for a future that wasn't meant to last,
when I've seen it a million times before each time my heart was broken in the past.
I can't keep torturing myself believing that I've been wrong,
when I can hear it in your voice that you've been long gone.

So why do I hold on to empty promises and lies,
when I know in the end all you'll do is make me cry?
Why do I let you hurt me and believe its all because of me,
when I know deep down inside it was you who really wanted to be set free?
Why do I cause myself this pain,
when I know deep down inside of me things will never be the same?

I guess I do what I do because I love you even through the tears.
I need you to help me face my fears.
I want you to love me like I love you.
I long for you to tell me this love is true.
I pray that one day you'll see that this is where you want to be.
I hope that one day you'll once again love me.
I just love you, theres not much more that I can say.
I'm not ready to give up on you,
even if right now my skies are gray.