Dear God

Dear God,
This note is the extremity
To my discontented life
In 5 minutes I shall be gone
To a place of hope and love
Instead of death and fear
I will hurt no more
The pain will be released from my body
Not from the cuts to my wrists
Not from the vile being purged from my stomach
But through each breath
The pain escapes easily
And with each of those breaths
A smile is more willing to form on my hardened face
I will cry no more tears
I will cut no more skin on my wrists
I will throw up no more feelings from within
I will feel warm
From the happiness that is buried
Releasing from the chained girl within me
But down here
On the wretched earth
I cry
I cut
I puke
These actions divest me of my problems
For a diminutive amount of time
I feel free
I feel like those angels above us
Flying carelessly
Filled with love
With joy
But for those seconds, minutes, hours
Of each and every day of my life
I am me
Who I once was
The girl entangled within myself
The one who should be free
The one who has passions
Who loves life to the fullest
Who doesnâ??t cry, but smiles
She sees her life as a pleasure
Not a horrid chore
So please
Rid her of the chains that binds her weak body to the earth
The earth in which she doesnâ??t want to be
Unbind the cuffs from her wrists
Bare the cuts, the scars
The wounds that conceal her fragile body
Liberate her of my inner being
Let her be free.
Free to smile
To laugh
To have joy
I will deal with myself
She doesnâ??t deserve to be trapped
Free her
Please god
Just free her
She isnâ??t me and Iâ??m not her
I am my own, twisted being