The language feels formal in this and since it is written out like a letter it's perfect for it. I've read about how hard some of your life is been and sometimes things ain't far but the way you wrote this out is something that I think was a great way to explain how you might have been feeling when you wrote this. Really, I think people should read your poems.

Thanks for the comments on my poems!

This poem was well constructed. For this one in particular, and which few I do not see this in, I can actually hear the voice of the poem speaking to me each word. It was great, and it went smoothly till the end. The end came down really well. Hope to see some more of you!

It is such a good one as are all the others.
XxKaylaxX

Stumbled in here by accident, read this one and I really enjoyed it, its touching, also read that your poems are true/partly true.
been through alot in life myself, and I know how pain feels, when I read poems like yours which tells a small sad part of your life, I just wish I could make it all go away for you.

Two poems that really stuck to me was Victimizes and As A Child, very nice work Jay, fourteen years old and this talented? please dont ever stop writing since i'll be buying your books in the stores in a few years!

Even though you've been through alot of pain judging from your poems, remember that without sadness and pain, we would now know what happiness and joy means, hopefully things have turned out for the better for you now Jay

Now i'm tired as heck, its... soon morning urgh...

Keep it up, keep strong and you'll go far in life, trust me on that.
5/5

I really love the idea behind this one its expresses alot...keep it up i really enjoyed reading this one

*~CrImSon__TeArS~*

This portrayed a simple but poignant mesage, I love the ambiguity in both the feelings that the poet is going through and the person its directed at

Sondos

"To who it may concern" worked very well it added a somewhat impersonal touch to the poem but at the same time provoked concern. It was well written but saddens me to read about such unhappiness...I hope things look up for you...

[lostlaureate - come find me]

You did a great job! I loved this poem!
5/5

It had a sad, almost sarcastic ring running through it, like a small town girl returning home from the city to tell the folks that she is changed, different, no longer innocent...

I liked it!

//T.L.//

Aww.. wow, I love the way that you ended this poem. It really made me so sad. But you did a great job on this. You worded it very well, and described everything perfectly. My favorite part was:
To Whom Ever This May Concern,
I am lost in a world of dreams.
Wrapped in a coat of loneliness,
How empty my heart seems.
That is amazing! You did a great job on this! I loved it! 5/5 Keep it up!

That was a great poem! I love the theme and the title of this poem. It all flowed so well. That definitely speaks out to the world.

To Whom Ever This May Concern,
I am lost in a world of dreams.

[I loved this part]

Otherwise I loved it...It's how I feel some of the time. Great job...And you seem to like repeating yourself a lot [Are you happy...To who this may concern...ect] But I like it.

xDarkSuicidex5.5

I loved the way this was phrased like a letter and the ambiguity of "to whom it may concern" This is such formal language it could be meant to be a public letter to a group of people or I see it as being left somewhere for people to find ad ponder over later.
I loved the flow and heartfelt sentiment you are a great writer.

This poem is amazing.
its so full of emotion!
keep it up and thanks
for the comment!

UnderAge*

Thank you for your comment and your poems are really good keep writing : )

Woooow, i really love the ending of you poem:

To Whom Ever This May Concern,
I am no longer who I use to be.
I am no longer that happy little girl.
I am no longer me.

its soo good 5/5!

GO YOU! lol

Very good rhyming
your such a great poet
I absolutly love your work
5/5
kaila

Very good rhyming
your such a great poet
I absolutly love your work
5/5
kaila

A provocative and VERY well written piece. As opposed to your other works, this poem, in my opinion, possesses the strongest flow and sound rhythm. I must say, your wording here portrays a lot of emotion :).
However, a couple of adjustments are still required. First of all, the title. Now, I was put off a little by reading it. I seriously feel that the 'ever' is unnecessary and the piece will flow a lot easily without it. Secondly, this stanza:
"To Whom Ever This May Concern,
I just want to be forgotten.
No-one will ever understand
How hard this life of mine has been."

I would alter the latter line to:
"How hard my life has been". Just makes more sense to keep it more abrupt like the rest of the sentences there.
And finally, I would strongly suggest using the appropriate grammar! Lol, as opposed to constantly throwing in a full stop at the end of most of your lines (which tends to confuse a reader), use either a comma, semi colon ';' or leave it blank. Either of these ways and you've got yourself a brilliant poem.

Other than that, very well done. This was the best I read! :).

This is very interesting piece. The repitition had a nice function in it. You have managed to keep the rhymes though its not 100%. Its really nice and well penned. 5/5 you got it dear

With love
Fsams