This is a great poem i can do relate to the ups and downs of life i hear u on that one keep up the good work :)
xoxo take care
robyn

Sounds like a bad dream. I don't think I could handle a day like that. Awesome write!

Darien... This is a great write. A very open story, with some good and bad times. I hope you got something sorted about your cell. Enjoyable read :)

Excellent write, Darien... I love this, the flow was perfection and the content was intriguing... Great poem! ;o)

Awww Darien , I also hate those days that look so promising and then turn into one disaster ofter another ....

I do hope you have since found your cell phone , my friend .....darn things , they make them so small now . I remember when they first came out the were sooooo big . You nearly needed a pack sac to carry one....Well I guess I'm exaggerating a little ...lol....but they were big....

Take care , my friend .

What I love about this is it ooozes darien...i.e you. It felt so down to earth it was so well written. The rhyme felt so natural at times I didnt know it was there. You have style and its very unique...I am soo coming back for more...

[lost_laureate - come find me]

I totally understand about the ups and downs of life!! I have to agree with lost laureate the rhyme was very natural i almost didnt realize it!! Great Job!! 5/5!!

Very Good !!

I'd say it was a 4 Darien, but under the circumstances I stuck in a rare 5. :-)

Hope it helps!

I really really liked that Darien!! This was my favorite part...

A sad and disappointing end,
to a day that started well.
Ups and downs my life has,
This is my story I tell.

Keep up the good work..I think Im going to read and comment some more..Great job!

@}>-->--
Always4You

WOW, that was really great. yeah, so true. each and every life has its own ups and downs.
take care,
marjan

'to the arms of my beautiful sweets'

that line just didnt click for me. It's not one of my favorites but it wasn't a bad poem. 4/5

This was really good. I loved it. The rhyming and flow were good. And it was just good. Nothing I would change. Keep it up!! 5/5

`taleeee xx

Another great poem from you. It won't let me comment on waiting for the day so i commented on dear diary instead. Hope you don't mind but waiting for the day is a great poem too. I liked it alot. This poem is greatly detailed and wonderfully expressed how you feel. It was a mix between happy/sad feelings and I thought you did a great job. Keep up the talent :)

This is another great piece but i think that waiting for the day is better.
it is quite a sad poem cause i know i'd be upset if i lost the love of my life an my MOBILE all in one day i would be GUTTED
good work 4/5

gemma oxo

Aw.. and yet another great poem by you. I like the way that it started happy and ended kind of sad.. You did a great job on this! It had my attention from beginning to end. The rhythm and flow of it was really good & held up well. Great job on this!

I like this poem. I really like how you told how your whole day went; including the ups and downs.

The night ended in depression,
as I lost my precious cell phone.
My love leaving, my phone gone,
without them both I feel so alone.

This part really made me laugh. I am attached to my cell phone too. I would probably cry if i lost it!

I defianitly give you a 5/5.
Keep it up

True in modern society loosing your phone can be very upsetting and tramatic, how can we live with out them? However, in comparison to a loved one leaving, to it doesn't seem all that bad to me but hey...
You did well to describe a pretty awful day, something everyone goes through. The simplicity in how you wrote it helped me to relate too.
Well done.

If i were ever to be without my cell phone i dont know how i would survive lol! i really enjoyed reading this poem. The comment you left about the style i use when i write (two lines) didn't really affect me until i read this poem and saw how much better it was than a lot of my stuff... well i got lots of your stuff to go comment... so just to let you know, I really liked this poem..
even though we have had our arguements before,
lots of luv* and respect,

**meggie**

Very good poem, i lost my cell once, but it turns out my bro put it down the toilet.

*~vixen~*