Sitting here
staring at the computer screen
reading your away message
over and over again
waiting hopelessly for you to come back
wondering what it is that you could be doing
thoughts start racing
my mind starts to wander
does he like me?
does he really love me?
or does he just say it out of habit?
does he sit here and wonder too?
or am i just stupid?
living in a world of lies
and false hope
then you come back
you IM me and we start talking
but your taking forever
constantly stopping the conversation
for minutes that seem like hours
my imagination over comes me
theres another someone isn't there?
he hates me... he thinks I'm annoying
what if he wants to break up?
what if he doesn't like me anymore?
what if? what if? what if?
20 minutes pass...
and you still haven't said anything
then i hear the sound of your IM box
i stop what i was doing
excited to see what you've said
but your only telling me you have to go
and without a simple i love you...
your gone and your away message is back
i read it... its the usual I'm sleeping
i still sit there staring blankly at the screen
depressed.... wanting... longing to be there with you
does this sound crazy?
am i obsessed?
what is this feeling?
i hate it! why must it taunt me?
why wont they just go away?
all this thinking makes me sadder and sadder,
with each passing thought
thinking in my case, isn't always a good thing
these feelings, these thoughts, this hopelessness
it kills me,
from my heart down to my wrists.
i try to resist, but the temptation is always there
wanting some way, some how to rid myself
of the tragic nightmares that taunt me day after day
because this isn't a one time emotion
its there with every breath i take
and everything i do....
everything reminds me of you.
what do i do to make this stop?
make these feelings go away?
do i want them to go away?
then i think...
every minute I'm with you
i dint have this problem
I'm enclosed in your love
but is it really love?
or is it just lust?
i don't know and i don't think you know either
but i hope you do
I'm confused, lost, scared,
because i know what this feeling is
its love... but do you love me?
or am i living on false hopes and lies?
