I didn't really get the poem but that didn't mean I could enjoy the beautiful word choice that made this poem hit hard at reality. The repetition was perfect, rare to get sometimes, and it didn't annoy me but made me like the poem even more. Nothing seemed forced and everything flowed right. Your vocab range is strong and each of your poems hold so much vivid imagery.

You have an awesome imagination. I understood your poem very well. Was it about a woman losing her innocence? Or something like that is what I think it's about. I give it a 5/5 dear. I love your vocabulary and style. I could feel how she was a dainty little snob. Lol. Good job.

What creativity and imagination. This poem was brilliant....the exceptional wording and flow was awesome!!!!
I really like how the beginning and ending stanzas were the same it reinforced the moral of the story in the poem!! Very nice write!!!

This is nothing I've read before - I liked the way you described the woman in this poem and I am intrigued to learn more. The phrase "wired skin of drinking straws" was very interesting it conjured up some vivid ideas....what does the phrase mean to you...im curious...Nicely written....original and entertaining in every right.

[lost_laureate - come find me]

WOW...I loved this poem, it was soo good, the creativity and imagination in this was so strong, everything fit in there just right, it wasnt forced the word range used in it made this poem defintly one of my favorets...great job 5/5
love always jennifer

It was very good, keep up the writing good job

This was really good. Loved how you repeated the first stanza at the end. Awesome write! Keep it up! 5/5

`taleee xx

I love the wording in this poem alot

and the great description of the
girl
this is amazing 5/5
im guessing its about
letting go of the past something bad that happened and not being able to cope.

Nice write i loved it, i loved the flow i just loved everything bout it 5/5

~!*FallenTears~!*
~!*Meaghen~!*

Great peice, well written with some great metaphors within. i had to read it a couple of times to get any understanding from it, but that's good as unlike many poems upon this site the meaning is not thrust upon the reader but hiden so that the reader must work for it. its brilliantly unique and very well written.

5/5

Hehe..I like it. The word choices worked very well and it flows nicely. It was a little hard for my mind to get. O_o But I still loved the rythem and flow of how it was carried, very well. ^^

WOW!!!! holy crap. your amazing. First of all i loved it and your vocabulary is... astonishing... that freakin poem blew me away it was soo great... at first i didnt get it but the more i read the clearer it got. It flowed really great you are completely awesome and you should definately keep writing. This poem deserves more then a 5. -jen-

I didnt really get the poem but i did enjoy the word choice and the flow!! You did a wonderful job on that!!! I would give it a 5/5!!

Sondos I know I already commented but I have to agree with Bob Shank. You are one of the few people I've read on here since I joined that has talent that could get you pretty far if you so chose it.

Like everybody else I thought it was teriffic, the rhyme scheme, word choice, story, and so on. I loved reading it, but then got to the end and felt let down. You built up a wonderfully metaphored story ( forgive me for pluralizing a noun), got the the climax, and then just ended with what felt like a half hearted denuemont (or however you spell it) and wrapped it up with the first stanza. If I had payed money to read it I would have been glad I had, but then at the end wanted half of the fair returned to me because I got three quarters great and one quarter not there. It ended abruptly and I think you need to add another stanza or two of something between the climax and the end. I am not sure, but you are obviously a great writer and thinker and will be able to find what you need.

Wow, this is extreamly unique, a brand new way of writing a poem about a tragic past. interesting, i enjoyed this very much. I loved ur rhyme scheemes, and your flow was amazing. 5/5

I'm not sure if I got the true meaning of this poem or not, but I'm very surprized it didn't get one of the top poems of the week! It's really good poem and you had excellent wording!

Thank you for all of your comments. For Cory Mastrandrea, thank you for your suggestion, I have added in an extra stanza near the end. Hope its okay

Thanks

Sondos

Wow that poem was really good.. The description of this was really well and The flow and rhythm of this was perfect. You have an amazing way with words, you are very talented! Keep it up!

Sondos!! what can i say that i have not saud before. Bob Shank and Kaylee are right. You are one of the best on this site.

this one is truly terrific. Your play of words, the rhyme... everything seems perfect.

well done. there is so much inspiration one can draw from you!

good luck and peace
shobhana