It's you...

Budweiser the king of beers.
The bringer of tears.
The maker of fears.
I thank god for the life I have.
Even if what I had was pretty bad.
I don't want that life again.
I don't want to think to back then.
I hate you mom.
And you realize that after I'm gone.
I got my stuff packed.
And I'm not coming back.
Your son is out the door.
And your passed out on the floor.
Keep drinking that beer.
Pretend that I wasn't even here.
Thanks mom, I love you too.
But that door was easy to walk through.
I smile and pretend it's okay.
But everynight and everyday.
I have to do the same.
I have to pretend that I'm fine.
But the damage is in my mind.
Memories that you made.
Memories that bring hate.
I hate you mom.
And you realized that after I'm gone.
I'm tired of watching you drink yourself to sleep.
I'm tired of these memories I keep.
Silence seems to be my key.
And hatred is what your love is to me.
I hate you for everything you did.
I hate you for the memories of when I was a kid.
Night after night.
Fight after fight.
I watched him beat you.
And there wasn't anything I could do.
I wish there were times I couldn't see.
Then I didn't have to watch him turn on me.
There's where all my scars are.
That's why calling you mom is so hard.
Your not my mom.
Not after I was gone.
I made it on my own.
Everything I did, I did alone.
Without you.
Now there's nothing you can do.
I'm here, your there.
It doesn't matter, I don't care.
Reach for that bottle of beer.
It doesn't matter, I'm already here.
You promised you'd quit drinking.
And I'm stupid for thinking.
You would.
Thinking you could.
For letting you call me your son.
After everything that you've done.
Your son died when he left you.
And there isn't anything you can do.
Just turn back to the beer like you used to.
Back to the beer, just for you.
Your kids didn't matter then, why should they now?
Nah, Mom...I hate you.
The only person that hasn't realized it was....you