The ocean breeze part 1

by just a little girl   May 17, 2006


A calm blue ocean breeze
i glance across the turquoise sea
i see the sunlight across the bay
ships and sailors welcoming the new day

on a boat is where i lay
watching all the children play
amongst the children was an older boy
so perfect he looked like a toy

i couldn't believe he then looked at me
he then got up and approached the sea
he swam out to the boat
he lay back and began to float

his gorgeous tanned skin
i hoped i could have him
i dived into the sea
he swam to me

he touched my hand
we were far away from land
no one else was near
no one else to hear

    report violation
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Latest Comments

  • 17 years ago

    by amoxi

    I like how u leave mystery to this poem and i loved the ocean setting very good

  • 18 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    This was so sweet! One of my favourites yet

  • 18 years ago

    by Kalgalath

    Even thought that wasnt about me it kind of made me feel like i was this boy, but i know that im not so yeah...

  • 18 years ago

    by Flaminia

    Well well well,I guess you could make the poem stronger.Good rhymes,but it lacks of something in the part from "I couldn't believe......he swam to me".It's just a suggestion,the rest of the poem is beautiful,only these two stofes should get stronger,deeper,They're too childish if compared with the rest...that's a full 4

  • 18 years ago

    by not a poet

    You have me beggin for more......!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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