BRIDGES (round 2)

Most people will not understand this b/c it is about something that happened to me..

sounds are drowned out
by internal screams
no sight left,
a red sheet of color
drowning in tears,
fear overtakes all notions
locked, driving,
to my own personal doom
i see him.
the cherry on top
it soars again in me
but quieted with one glance
of the uniforms and badges
alone in the waiting
scared and tear-streaked
time for round 2
he comes in
to exhausted to care,
fall asleep on his shoulder.
his deceit is far from mind,
stupid move.
when i wake, he is gone.
happiness and sorrow.
moved to a bed,
she is there
relief floods
the horrid food untouched,
drifting in and out of sleep,
finally, the stranger.
my lies are useless
sent upstairs
yet again, i walk the halls
i feel so safe
at home at the place i vowed
never to return to
the day room
i sit
conversation tries me,
going well until
a sudden twist
tears held in as she screams and threatens.
what did i do?
i sleep.
breakfast there is no sight of her
gone.
timid, unlike me, i sit.
nibble.
i leave to waste the day in sorrow
I'm trapped in white-walled rooms.
friends.
disbelief becomes me
soon tears
stream down my face yet again,
as i walk the halls one last time
and out the door.