I Lied and I'm Sorry

You think I am fine,
But the truth is I am dying.
I hate having to lie to you,
And telling you I am okay.

I really don't want to tell you this,
But basically I am lying to you
I still cut, I still drink
And I am still really unhappy

I made up that girl, you thought was your best friend
I made up my problems because my real ones are far worse!
I tell you I am fine and I lie to your face
I dont deserve you and you definitely dont deserve me!

I hope you forgive me so we can start over,
Because this pain I am feeling, is far from pure guilt.
Your suspicions were right about the comments on my space
I tried to make an illusion because suicide is my best.

I understand if you never want to talk to me again,
I wouldn't either! If you felt the way I do
Then I am sure you would understand.

These lies I live with, I regret every one
I stay up at night cutting what's been done.
I deserve all this pain and don't tell me I don't
And I am so sorry that I hurt you!