Life's War

~Dedicated to those in memories of my past.
Felipe, Docky, Ashley, Valerie, and Jade. ~
I hope you all found rest. . .

[part one]

Life just keeps hurting us,
one blow after the next.
So many things get broken,
nothing can just get fixed.

So many deaths,
we see them fall all around.
Now theres only a few soldiers left
who still stand their ground.

Im only still standing,
thanks to a numbered few.
But this pain of all the hits,
are not deserved to you.

Where I am placed in life,
so many shots are fired my way,
Im stuck in this placement forever,
so please just get away...

If I finally fall,
I know I gave it my all.
This game of life is so unfair...
Im still wondering, " What point is there? "

Heartbreaks and tragedies,
Depression and world wars.
What good does it do,
praying to that so-called " God " of yours?

Im tired of wasting my hope,
on this thing thats never shown.
He hasnt helped me so far,
I've made it on my own.

For every time someone falls,
it gets harder and harder for me.
But thats just what this game wants
greater and harsher difficulty.

Im not really sure,
what the point to all this is.
I personally want to die
and drift into an abyss.

But I couldnt leave my fellow soldiers,
to hold the front lines in pain.
With everything on sacrifice,
and nothing more to gain.

So stand up, and always fight.
get up when you fall.
Even though this s h i t is unfair.
We can take it all....

[part two]

What the H E L L am I thinking?
This war isnt just about me.
So many other soldiers out there.
Whose pain I cannot see.

All this stuff is bulls h i t
and my poems self-centered too.
God D a m n i t Im so irate-
But what is there I can do?

I worry about many soldiers,
whose war is harder than mine.
and still I relentlessly hope
that everything will be fine.

Soldiers lives are taken,
when that have so much to live for.
So much lost potential..
drained out during life's war.

I just dont know what to think.
my mind is such a mess.
Although I hate to admit it now,
this much I must confess...

I dont want to die yet,
and death has affected me.
This world is a f u c k e d up place...
but why must this always be?

The past few years Im emo-
and have been so depressed.
So many problems just for myself..
but what of all the rest?

To God I sometimes thought-
at times Ive even prayed;
I want this place to be better,
it doesnt have to be this way.

So how f u c k e d up must it be,
before this war turns around?
complete world destruction,
and death thats so abound?

My mind is torn apart,
I can no longer make this clear.
Life's war changed this soldier
who serves upon the frontier...

[part three]

I want to see through other's eyes,
to understand how the feel.
Why are we all fighting this war,
just to know whats real?

We all have our own defenses,
we have made ourselves own shields.
But no one has perfected this art,
thats why were still on battlefields.

all our wars are different,
we all have challenges to face.
but as soldiers we mustnt fall behind,
we mustnt lose our pace.

We have to keep fighting,
although we may not win.
For if we surrender now,
we'll never know what could have been.

We mustnt give up hope,
no matter how dim the light may be.
Soon the war will end for us,
and we all will become free.

I know that this war is hard,
at times your fall into a pit.
but always fight and stand,
never f u c k i n g quit.

Mourn the loss of soldiers,
who have fallen in your stead.
But dont dwell on past events,
dont ever lose your head.

Although Ive become ill,
Im still in fighting stance,
My clothes and spirit are torn,
but Im still waiting for my chance.

I want to win my war,
so I don't have to fight this anymore.
This has gone on for far too long,
and its becoming harder to stay strong.

Now I've rambled on,
about my own experienced wars.
Please follow my advice.
and take it into yours.

Im not being sincere,
this is the cold-stone fact.
Life's war is hard on us all,
but we must deal with that.

Ive been awake for days,
and exhaustion has taken its fill.
Im still fighting this war of mine,
and I forever will.

Although I wish to stop,
I wont allow myself anymore.
Im just another soldier holding one,
still fighting this never-ceasing war...

Sorry its long, three poems slammed together....