Leaving *Part 1*

Lying in my bed at night,
I wonder what would happen-
If I were to
just
disappear.

Wonder about who would miss me,
If anyone at all.
I wonder if HE would miss me.
I wonder if JJ would miss my calls.

I wonder what reactions would be.
Surprised? Angry?
I want to know what mom would do.
Call the cops? Ignore it?

I wonder how I would get by,
With only $40 in my pocket.
Would I screw it on nothing?
Or just leave?

Enough wondering, I think.
And I open my window.
I pack my backpack with cold flooding the room.
And I leave.