Every Time

Every time I close my eyes
I see every kick, every punch
And I cannot help but wonder
What did I do to you?

You who doesn't know my name
You who I only see once in a while
What could I have done that was so bad?
Why do you punish me so hard?

If I was someone else would it be the same
Or would you leave me to be myself?
Is it because I refuse to take your s*it
Is it because I don't follow the crowd?

It's not my fault that I cannot let myself go
It's not my fault that I cannot stop the voices
The voices that refuse to believe in what you say
I cannot control these emotions that are slipping through

I'll take the slaps, the kicks and the punches
But please don't play the hero
It's you that made me this way
Don't pretend you're trying to help now

Every time I close my eyes
I see you with your fake smiles
Every time I close my eyes
I hope they don't open again

(I have no idea where this came from and no not all of it's true. I do close my eyes and hope i don't open them again though)