Lost Friendship

by Irish Sweetheart   Jun 11, 2006


I'm sitting here thinking of us,
all the good times we had,
walking the streets,
and watching the sunset,
you making me laugh,
until the sun went down,
but those wonderful days,
don't happen anymore,
not ever since you stopped,
coming around,
what's the matter,
what you don't love me anymore,
fine be that way,
don't say hello,
just leave your best friend,
out in the cold.

Danielle-2003

    report violation
0


Did You Like This Poem?

Latest Comments

  • 18 years ago

    by Sean Allen

    "don;t say hello,"
    heh, you got a semicolon in there instead of an apostrophe.
    ~~~
    "you don't love me anymore,"
    I think this would sound better if phrased as a question, e.g.:
    "don't you love me anymore"
    ~~~
    I think that once the poem got to the line "coming around", the rhythm was disrupted. The leading cause of this was probably a change in how long the lines were. If I were you, I'd try to lengthen a few of the lines, if not every other one to set up a varying rhythm. Good poem, and nice details, especially at the start.

More Poems By Irish Sweetheart