Questioning my life...

Should I grab my razor blade?
and cut until my pain can fade?
see only rain on sunny days?
and viciously hack my life away?

should i turn to alcohol?
to strip me of problems big and small?
and take my life once and for all?
to lose the grasp of life and fall?

shall i stab my bleeding heart?
and stop the pain before it starts?
and tear my very own life apart?
And wish that I could never restart?

can I flood myself of tears?
and wipe away the endless years?
which brighten up my deepest fears
And make this pain even more severe?

Where do I destroy this regimen?
From which this hurt and tears began?
And pain came back again and again
From those backstabbers we call "friends"?

Can I erase the memories
Of what I have become to be?
Because the things held dear to me
Have been erased from eternity

How do I stitch up the wounds
And thread the needle through the loom
If I continue to fear I'm doomed
Residing in darkness without the moon?

Where can I get rid of this pain?
Which I fear will always seem to remain
In a place I cannot contain
That leaves me to live out my life in vain?

There's no one in which I can depend
There's no way to make amends
There's nothing I can defend
And this is why I've reached my end