Let through the broken memories
Of times that came and went
Think of times my heart was breaking
And this time my tears are spent
My eyes are brimming to the edge
And I'm back to a time way back when
Sobbing until I just can't breath
and hope diminishes once again.
And I can't force back thoughts of you
Without shutting my body down
And falling into a numb existance
Of letting you push me around.
I remember you loved to hurt me
Relished the pain that I still feel
You loved the confusion I put myself through
When I told myself it was never real.
Hundreds of miles away and I'm haunted
By the resilience in your voice.
I stand along, untouched yet shattered
How could this be my choice?
Everything you do or say is a lie
Designed to keep me up all night
Wondering if you really care about me
Or if you're just looking for a fight.
When I was young I may have believed
That you and I were the best of friends.
But every knot I've made in this life
It was for the best and you frayed the ends.
I beg to the last humane part of you
Stop whispering death threats in my sleep
I can't rescue you when you're so selfish
To the pain you feel and the tears you weep.
I know exactly how you feel, Mom.
Your own troubles are now mine...
But I can't take another suicide attempt
Or the dead sound on the phone line.
I'm running out of resources quickly
And my tears are too far gone to gain
In the end, you just have to be strong
And learn to fight your own pain.
Mommy, I'm just a little girl
For you I've cried until my eyes were sore.
And i beg of you to stop blaming me
Because I cannot, will not cry anymore.
