Lord I Need A Healing

Lord, I need some answers
To these unanswered prayers
Why do I have to be so different
Why do I feel like you don't care.

How could you allow this
Everyone's giving up on me
Its all getting worse Lord
Why can't you just leave me be?

Why can't doctors find the answers
For the reason for all this pain
Like why do I lose the feeling in my legs
Why is it weight, I just can't gain?

Why do I pass out so often
Why's my lungs getting so bad
Why do I forget things I shouldn't
Why's everyone around me so sad?

Why sometimes, can't I breathe
Why do get these so called, attacks
Every time this stuff happens
My faith in you begins to lack.

Did you happen to forget,
I'm only 16 years old
All I want is to be normal,
Strong, faithful and bold.

Everyone keeps reminding me
That everything happens for a reason
that's so hard to believe now
When doctors say i may not see next season?

Why can't I just go back
To when I could do things I love
Like cheer, dance, and swim
And fly like a dove.

Lord I always loved to fly
Because I thought I was closest to you
You wouldn't put anything on me I couldn't handle
Now I know that's not true.

Lord you knew my heart
And you knew that it was right
Everyone knew I was a church girl
Why am I left alone, no friends in sight.

I had plans for my life
To become a missionary
But I need my faith back
I need you to show me I can believe.

Although I am so hurt and confused
By no one alone, but you
I know you can make miracles happen
If that's what you choose to do.

While I'm barely hanging on
Listen to what I have to say
I'm not ready to leave this world
I'll do anything, Lord just let me stay.

No one knows what's wrong with me
Lord you're the only one
I want more then anything to pull through
And say to everyone, I won!

This I promise to you
In the end you'll get all the praise
Not just in the beginning
But for the rest of my days.

I just want to go home
For all this to end
I want to sleep in my own bed
And go out with family and friends.

I say this prayer to you today
Please don't make it my last
I want to serve you longer
And leave all this in the past

Lord I am begging
For a healing from you
Build not only my faith back up
But my friends, and family's too.

**This poem is true, I usually have so much faith, but here lately everything is getting worse. As of right now, no one really knows whether I will make it to see next month or not. No one expected anything like this to happen to me, we thought we had my health under control; little did we know it was getting worse by the day. I just wish we knew what's wrong with me, that would possibly make it easier to bear, but no one has a clue. I've had TONS of tests ran, with no answers. Please don't take life for granted, you'll never know how much you love someone until times like these and if there's any cheerleaders/dancers out there...put your heart into it, and love it with everything you've got! That alone was my life, and now I would do anything to be able to do that again.**