OH MY GOD CHELS! how did you EVER DO THIS ONE??? it is freakkkkking awesome....oh mercy...lovely...lovely..

"She finally found him one day just walking down the street
With a new girl on his arm, he just looked so complete"

^^
these lines hit me more than they could possibly have hit that girl...and you know why...oh well...life's like that. but chelsey asked me to smile and thus i shall...smile. :)
have a great day.
Dhaval

Damn Chels... Superb stuff. Deep, and heart breaking. Kind of hits home. A very enjoyable read.

I like the last stanza, and parts of the rest of the poem are well written but it is let down in areas. For example:
He packed his things, left the key, took off in the night
She came home with no heat on; they also cut off her lights
She knew she had know room to even say what he did was not polite
It was her fault that he left so uptight

*It should be no instead of know, unless you are trying to say something which didn't come across very well.
*There is little rhythm in this section and it makes it difficult to read.
*The rhymes seem slightly forced.

Good start for a poem, but I think it still needs quite a bit of work.

Wow.. i really liked this poem. But I did feel that some of the rhymes were forced and some parts didn't really flow well, but other than that it was pretty good.

@...well...i cant say it was the best you've done..and i did go to a couple of your other poems to compare:)...but it can be a really good poem if u just, like some others have said, fix some that forced rhyming...i hope this doesn't offend you in any way, its's just a bit of constructive critisism:):)...@

Lovely poem, raw emotion. Very well written.
5 from me.
Well done! ^.^

Wow this poem was so awesome!!! I really,really really really liked it..........Man if I could have given you a 10 then I would have. I loved it.

Please r/r/c rose colored glasses

Good job, excellently written my friend.
you have a rare talent that not many do

Hey there great poem chicky, well done.
shayazzaxxxooo

MY GOD!! thats amazing but truley deep i love it so much sadness and depression so well put together and come to my surprise it turned out super
its amazing hwo you could write sucha sad poem with such beaty xoxroxyxox

Purely amazing. this made me cry, so much tallent, and it shows in this poem... i loved it, keep up the amazing work, you'll get far.

heidi may

Thank you for commenting and making that suggestion on my poem.

i really like this one, Her body was up for bid is a really strong phrase, i really liked it!
keep it up!

Awesome

Omg!! i fell in love with this as soon as i read it!!! so much sadness, but woven into it is the simplicity of the truth. awesome job!!! keep up the good work!!!!
~maggie

This is an amazing piece of work. Boy has it been a long time since Ive read one of your poems and It was one of the first things I did when I got back on here.. hehe (ITS MAYBETH) But Ive missed your poems very much.. your talent still leaves me in AWE.. gr8 work! hehe Love it Chels!

=)

This is an amazing piece of work. Boy has it been a long time since Ive read one of your poems and It was one of the first things I did when I got back on here.. hehe (ITS MAYBETH) But Ive missed your poems very much.. your talent still leaves me in AWE.. gr8 work! hehe Love it Chels!

=)

Wow...this poem pretty much left me speechless. It's absolutely beautiful. You're definitely talented, and I'll be sure to read many more of your poems! Great work! =)

x.xBrokenx.x

Awwwh..this is a sad poem but it's very well written, keep it up and thanx for the comments on my 2 poems =)

p.s. that poem titled "story of her life" isnt true its just a topic

We never really realize what a persone means unless theyre taken away.. great one..

Another great poem. I really enjoyed reading your poems. You are talented. Keep it up 5/5