The Solitude of Tonight (Monchielle)

by HOLLY ARMER   Jun 25, 2006


Drunk again on cheap wine
the crimson liquid swirls
within the dying light
casting me into the
solitude of tonight

Drunk again on cheap wine
as the memories turn
a nasty shade of black
me on my knee's begging
for you to take me back

Drunk again on cheap wine
as you turn me away
without a second glance
Screaming into the night
just give me one more chance

Drunk again on cheap wine
it's all too much to take
torturing myself with
the drunken remembrance
of us, a lover's myth

*Monchielle consists of four stanzas.
Each stanza has five lines.
The first line is the same in every stanza.
Each line has 6 syllables.
Lines three and five rhyme.
Rhyme pattern: Abcdc Aefgf Ahiji Aklml
Capital letters are refrains.

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Latest Comments

  • 16 years ago

    by Dan Bloom

    Last stanza where you rhyme with "with". When you use with it breaks the rhythm of the poem because with carries the statement through to the next line. Just a suggestion haha

    btw sorry its cut into two comments... im on a laptop and i accidentally touched the pad and it send it when i was halfway through writing it.

    Great poem 5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by Dan Bloom

    Wow. I love this poem. Very well done! It is very powerful. Finally a poem i have read today that leads somewhere.

    The tone is written perfectly. It seems like the person feels absolutely hopeless.

    IfI have any suggestion for you at all it would be the

  • 17 years ago

    by Rachel RTVW

    I loved formed poetry and you did a great job!

  • 18 years ago

    by shobhana kumar

    Holly!! you never cease to amaze me with the power of your words and your ability to write on just about anything.

    "the drunken remembrance
    of us, a lover's myth"

    these words are outstanding.

    peace
    shobhana

  • 18 years ago

    by sibyllene

    Oh yeah! i love the last stanza

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