Hating You Is Exhausting

I don't think i could count up
All of the horrible ways
That you put my whole world
Into a foggy, delirious haze

Instead i block them out
With the words "I hate you"
But one thing i know
Is that those words are not true

I tell my friends you're evil
And that I'll never care again
But how can i walk away
From someone who use to be a friend?

I try to fall in love with others
So my heart won't beat for only you
But when i come back around
You're the one i end up coming to

I'm tired of saying i hate you
I'm sick of acting like it's true
Because after the rain is done
I only see your face shining through

Hating you is exhausting
It beats the hell out of me
Loving you is also confusing
But I'll do that willingly