Concentrate on the horizon, focus on your position.
stay awake.
you take another swig.
distracted by the bright lights, you stray to the left and your gaze fixates upon the oncoming bullets of sadness and grief.
stop.
regain control.
breathe.
you glance to the right and parallel streams of rushed passion and dying romance take over your vision.
it becomes blurry.
shake it off.
your grip on the bottle tightens.
you need to focus.
the car is running on empty.
you are running on empty.
you keep going.
two more minutes.
you feel the earth beneath the tires change.
it's softer.
fertile.
you stop, put the car in park and jam your mixed cd into the player.
next, you turn up the volume on the radio, grab your bottle and get out of the car.
you take a deep breath.
you're craving for air.
you're starving for it.
another gulp and the bottle's empty.
you throw it over the edge and watch it fall.
it's windy.
you don't notice.
all you see is the waves crashing against one another.
against the rocks.
against the escarpment.
you walk back over to the car,
taking off your shoes, your sweater.
the sweater she gave you.
it still smells like her.
the track changes to number three.
harder, louder than the others.
courage swells inside you.
you feel strong.
five steps and you're at the edge again.
once last deep breath.
jump.
you hit the water, but you don't feel it.
a numbness overtakes you.
you close your eyes.
your body sinks.
but you don't fight it.
deeper, deeper..
