DAT IS SO SWEET GOD BLESS HER!

This again was touching however it has a few minor problems overall it flows well except for this line:

In your flat you should be,

I don't know but for me it didn't fit in as well. I loved the last line and really felt the sadness. You are very talented and this was excellent. I'd give it a 4.9/5 but that's just because i'm fussy!