by Allison Jun 27, 2006
category :
Friendship, family /
love, friendship
Its kills me to see you hurt |
Great poem! You expressed well how you feel when someone you care about it hurting and you dont know why---Lots of emotion! It flows nicely and I like the rhyme in it. I dont think that it is cheesy because it didnt feel forced,,,which is good! The only thing that broke up the flow for me is at the end when you put ''you'' as ''u''. I just wasnt expecting it because the rest of the poem had ''you'' spelled out. Besides that it is perfect. Great write---5/5--- |