Old love new problems

Whats happening here?
he was my problems
but it seems the night cleared
i was hiding from you
first glance in your eye
first kiss you stole
first heart shattered
you left me thinking i didn't matter
i moved on from you
or so i thought
now he's out of the picture
and I'm shocked
by how fast i feel for you again
how much pain i have to stand
how much hurt I'm going through
I'm back at the beginning
all because of you...
i love you so much
but this seems as a dying love
not as in it's fading
but because it's killing me slowly
you were the first
and now always the worst
you love her
and once again I'm just a toy...
will i be able to stop this, this time?
or will i fall back in your arms
and this time never to break free?
I'm screaming to the skies...
someone please kill me...