This is fantastically written, I love some of the images and concepts you have used, they are very effective making for a powerful piece. I especially like the final stanza, which really seems to finish off the piece well and sum up all the previous ideas.

I think I may have spotted a slight typo in the second stanza where you say “every stop this numbness” should the “every” maybe be “ever”? just thought I’d check as wasn’t sure

A very well written piece

5/5

Whoa... my comment went mad...

it did say:

"every stop this numbness" should the "every" be "ever"?

sorry... not sure what happened there....

Hey! You know, I love your poems, they are good. And this one was awesome, it was wonderfully written
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5/5..Well Written, ANd Not Immature at all, I like it, Talent, But I do Think That You have the potential, To make poetry that will speak to every soul, even the ones that are rock hard..keep it up

love your work
-angel of disguise-

This poem has good imagery. Nicely done.

You Write So Intellectualy Thats Its Heart Stoppingly Beautiful! ...I'm Over-Impressed With Your Style & I'm Falling In Love With Your Poetry 5/5 xoxo-Nikki-xoxo