10 months have passed since
i still see your smiling face
the way it glows into light
the way it always made my day
i know you have forgotten me,
my memories are lost forever,
but still you beat in my heart,
growing day by day more stronger,
just when i saw your picture,
everything again rekindled everything,
how much you lied and made me a shame,
all the wounds still pinch in my heart,
still you think I'll but retaliate,
still you think I'll try and make my way to you,
running away from me touching you,
creating a criminal out of innocence,
too much pressure my brain took
i was so close to madness in there,
cutting myself outside and inside
fighting with myself to speak each day,
none really to whom i spoke wholly
so i was tied by your stupid promise,
kept the hurt deep dark within me
while you started a new happy life,
when i tried to break free you made me feel sad,
acted as if i had committed a sin,
broken the trust lost so long ago,
made a prisoner in my own trial of love,
how much i forsake for you,
but your vengeance upon my soul was so costly to me,
shattered my present and future of my being,
brought me down to my child self again,
even now when i see your once warm smile,
i see an evil lurk in your eyes,
the innocence covered by lust and wickedness,
tells the story of a temptress at her game,
wounded i am as i am a lost soldier,
as i choose to fight this cruel world,
i choose you as my shield still,
though your are also my target to be,
the old love of mine fighting with the present predator,
even if it had been but a dream
how bad would its outcome be,
none of realities bite so hard though as of you and me,
so many cuts cover my heart that it aches when i breathe,
heavy in whole body of mine,
i step so lightly on this solid ground,
the reality is so lost as i am trying so hard to regain,
don't know when i shall reach my destination and finish my cycle on earth,
but whenever i see your face everything comes back to life,
so hard it is to forget as it is to forgive,
every day this pain stays as every day i take your name,
still this tragedy is locked in my heart,
i tell no friend as i tell no enemy,
i keep so silent as not to be heard,
this sweet pain is indeed life again.
