The Real Torment Of It

I hunted through the scribbled lines

Of words left ringing in my ears

Seeking, perhaps, the hidden signs

That justify my deeper fears

And bring me now so close to tears

Perhaps some shade of faint affection

Stirred within your chilling gaze

A glance that held some blurred reflection

Of kindness you had left unphrased

Those were such painful, foolish days

I yearn to find this guilt unfounded

No apologies, My lips are sealed

But there is truth, perhaps, that's grounded

In something human, something real

"Perhaps," I whisper, "He could feel"

This masqureade that I've devised

Has nearly gone beyond my bearing

Yet, the wounds are well disguised

Behind the stoic mask I'm wearing

But how to mend a heart still tearing?