Nice i liked it!

Great build up, I thought your repetition was used very well, and your rhyme scheme was simple yet good enough to pull your stanzas together quite nicely. However, the build up I thought went no where. I was disappointed with the ending. I don't think it was dramatic or emphatic enough for all the hype in the begining and middle of your poem.

Cory-Thanks for the tips. im going to change it alittle bit, youre right, it goes no where, i think im going to add like 4 more stanzas to explain and add details.
Thanks

xLaurenx

Light shouldnt play with darkness if not embraceing him

Lurking in the darkness
It preys on the young and old.
Hunting, Preying,
it turns passion deathly cold.
((Your weakest lines.. Not horrible, though. Just not the best. =]))
Attacking, Killing
its love and hate alike.
((The best lines.. I loved them. They simply captured me.))

I'm not sure how I feel about this. I know I like it, rest assured, but somethings missing. Maybe more detail/explination to exactly what your talking about? I don't know.. Good luck. It still deserves a '5'. Sorry you got downrated.

xTheEcstasyOfSuicidex 5.5

This poem was very suspenseful, and I loved the little twist at the end.