I liked your poem, though more people would read it if you would change your i's for I's. I don't really care, I like it the way it is.

In the first line you wrote: "The bitterness starts this endless night". I think that line is pretty cool, because I know those nights, and they are endless. The next lines are just as good and clear, I liked them and if they were more detailed they would be even better.

I think the ending is something you can improve. But I think you haven't finished it yet, so, let me know when you do. I would love to read it.

Good job!

XoXo
Gaby